Many parents, myself included, struggle with feelings of guilt or hypocrisy around their own technology habits, especially when setting rules for their children.

Guilt and Tech Use

Guilt often surfaces when our behaviour conflicts with personal values or causes harm, even in small ways. For example, being distracted by a phone during family time can lead to “technoference” – technology interfering with connection. A 2023 Pew Research Center survey found that 46% of teens notice their parents are sometimes distracted by phones when they want to talk. To address guilt, ask yourself:

Is this guilt warranted?

Am I living in line with my intentions?

Reflecting on these questions helps parents align tech use with family priorities.

Hypocrisy and Tech Rules

Hypocrisy occurs when adults forbid behaviours they themselves engage in. Common examples include parents keeping devices in bedrooms while asking kids not to, or scrolling at the dinner table despite a “no phones” rule. Sometimes this feeling is justified; other times, it isn’t, such as responding to an urgent work message during a meal. The key is transparency: explain why you’re using your device so rules don’t feel arbitrary.

Practical Tips for Families

• Discuss tech habits openly. Ask your child: Are there times when my tech use feels distracting or frustrating?
• Clarify why certain rules differ for adults and kids. Many restrictions exist for safety and developmental reasons. 
• Model intentional tech use. Share efforts to change habits and invite your child to join the conversation.

Have a wonderful long weekend!